till now still so hollowed inside

empty...jus so empty, im like a jig-saw puzzle wif a missing piece. incomplete.

i dunno...jus get on wif it

it hurts. the feeling of being powerless to lessen ur pain...when u say ur problems and i dunno hw to help u solve them, really wanted to be there when u needed company...though u always disappeared abruptly without warnings, always leave me hanging when txting. always figuring out how to remove ur daily sighs...but find that none of the things i thought worked. but then again i wonder, why am i still so cling onto u even when i know the status quo? cos i jus want you to know ur never alone because im always alone in the heart, and i dun wan u to exp the same thing as me.

the feeling when you sent smses to other ppl but no 1 replied u is crushing...rly crushing. esp when im in camp and i jus want to hear a voice of some1 thats close to me...though conversation might be short but it still somewhat soothes the heart. and the fact that it hurts and the feeling is crushing, i cant cry. or shld i say i chose not to cry because its meaningless tears, tears that wont help me change anything even if i cry, only drawing pity. saddens me yes....issit because of the way i am? i sometimes reflect to think if im a retard...and the same question keep popping out: why?

i write this post...isit because of pity? no, its because i read my dear friends posts...and this is wad i felt. even now, i...well...dunno how to describe this feeling...its alot of emotions mixed up together but i know for 1 thing i really miss her...be it talking to her or being with her...haiz...