1st step and lots of thinking

woke up at 10am this time....holy shit, i am getting worst!
decided to skip exercise for today...something i will regret but...oh wells.
stone in the morning till around afternoon, then proceed to go to work.
the feeling of being at home with nthing to do...is really getting to me.
i want to do something but the....the laziness gets the better of me.
i need to control my diet too....yesterday had dinner with dave and had jap food for dinner....so carbs are soo....sinful. then we go akb48 cafe because dessert wasnt satisfying enough ;D. im alrdy going into calorie debt liao....haiz...somemore today i never make an attempt to "repay" my debts. so now im hoping the "interest" wont roll hahaha.

i really wonder what am i going to do after i ord.
should i study?
-currently i only had a mechanical diploma with not so good results
should i go and work?
- currently aiming for a job but 1st i had to go thru the interviews 1st.
if not, what should i do?
-not in any position to go for an extended holiday vacation.
 wad is my nxt step in life?
from primary school, i look forward to : secondary school
from secondary school, i look forward to : study at poly
from poly, i look forward to : army
so after army, what should i do?

if you ask me, i want to do the things i like. and that is to be on a plane. either to pilot it or be a cabin crew is fine. and because im in the service industry for quite some time now. i really wanna try out to serve in the air.
what i really want to though, is to fly a plane. but i was restricted. by my family, by my parents.
they were under the impression that signing on in the army will not give /provide me with a good future. but then deep in my heart, i want to. at least go for the trial exams to see if i'm eligible for the pilot course. but i was disappointed to know that to be a pilot, u need to have a degree in aerodynamics....and with my diploma results, it just depress me further. im still regretting the fact that i did not sign up for the pilot course while i was in bmt....so now im stuck in this choice: where should i go and what should i do?

im beginning to hate it whenever my father ask me "wad are u going to do after u ROD? (his term of saying ORD because he cant differentiate ORD and ROD even after i have explained to him)" because, if he had not stop me from signing on, i would be training as a ME1 as an AMS technician? or that im probably will be in australia training for my pilot course. but he manage to dissuade me from signing on despite the fact that i told him that working in the airforce is counted as working experience. but being not wanting to go against him and fight even more. i relented, and so, now i face with a choice : work or study.
i want to be a pilot and fly a commercial plane. but to do that you will need alot of license. and does licenses couldnt be gotten like how u get ur driving license. if you ask me, flashing your ATPL license is at other ppl is btr than flashing ur driving license. why? because not everyone get a pilot license thats why.
so....i have my own plans. and i dun plan to let my parent feed me.
but i need to take my 1st step into the real world 1st.
and like they said, the 1st step is always the hardest step to take.
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its always time time time and always TIME.
there is a time and place for everything and schedules are a must to keep.
priorities are given to important task at hand and last min. request will be rejected unless (e.g. somebody died, my wife went into labour, i have free time on hand, schedules are still free enough to shift and move around)

oops, too late liao, shall explain in another time. chiao XD

self training #1

tell myself last night i will wake up at revelie timing : 0545.
did not manage to do so.
wake up at 0700. then laze around until now.
gotta work on my discipline.