Rented feelings

Rmb during the last post that i mention that my brother ask if i felt i belong to this family anot...i sometimes felt it, sometimes not. That is, i feel like im jus a tentant living in a rented room.except that i dun pay rent.....sometimes i rly want to gt out of the house. I am growing more and more impatient.....my patience is running thin, but i think it would take more than that to make me snapped.

But why issit that i feel like this? I dunno either....might be because im alrdy 23 and still a part timer? And wondering wad to do with my life? Might be cause im stress over how am i going to survive in singapore?

there is just no point.....

there is no point in arguing....
wad done is done
fight for wad....
wad am i defending for?
im in the wrong and thats it
nthing to fight for...its late alrdy
say wad u want
i dun care anymore
i want to move out of the house and be independent soon.
let me wallow in loneliness myself
my brother said he dunno how to talk to me
scared i will angry at wad he say...
very difficult to understand/know me.
really meh?
i dunno myself...
sometimes i put myself over others
sometimes i jus dun care
i am selfish, and mostly only get interested in things that affects me...other than that....i rly couldnt be bothered.
he ask if i actually cared for my family
i did, and i still care for them....
jus in a different way
but sometimes when emotions ran high
i want out.
jus to be on my own with my freedom.
ah well...
wad done is done
the least we can do is move forward
and when we look back....the road behind us alrdy disappeared.
there is nthing u can bring back...except memories.