i found that im very poor at expressing myself...i cant bring myself to say out "i like you" or "i love you" infront of ppl...i have something to confess...if i had said that time and place matters...abit true and abit on my attempt to escape...i foresee things...things that i will do and will surely go wrong or wont happen , my inner sense tell me not to do it...but i still do it...cos i folo my heart...this i can tell u now its 100% accurate.
i foresee the breakup wif xm, even b4 i begin courting her...but i still do it...i rmb the time i had wif her...i CURSE my weak body...it shivers during cold at the slightest drop of temp. whenever i think of it...i feel so paiseh!!!! Y DOES THIS THINGS KEEPS HAPPENING TO ME?!!?! I HAD IT ! I HAD ENUF! WHY WHEN I WANT THINGS TO GO LEFT IT GO RIGHT, Y ISIT WHENEVER I LIKE A GIRL ITS ALWAYS ONE-SIDED, WHY DOES SUCH THINGS HAVE TO HAPPEN TO ME...I NOW SO FRUSTRATED AT MY OWN LIFE RIGHT NOW IM CRYING...NOT SADNESS...ITS ANGER...Y I ALWAYS FEEL SO LEFT OUT? FRIENDS? DUN KID WIF ME, I DUN REALLY HAVE BEST FRIENDS...I HAVE LOTS OF FRIENDS YES BUT BUT....not 1 know the real me....the real me that is suffering in me...the outer me try to show an alternative image of myself, but my inner real self if taking on the burden of all the dark secrets that i have...and i know...these secrets cant be let out...AT ANY COST...IT WILL CAUSE ME MY REPUTATION...IF PPL WERE TO KNOW WADS MY HABIT...THEY WILL SHUNNED ME! BUT! WAD CAN I DO? THOSE ARE THINGS THAT FOLO ME FOR THE PAST 20 YRS OF MY LIFE...ITS NOT SOMETHING THAT I CAN CHANGE THAT EASILY...its not someting...a girl will like...i get that im a weird person...i get that froma lot of girls...but i dunno wads so weird abt me???? do i look as if i enjoy being weird? NO I DUN , BUT THEN I DUNNO WAD TO SAY BUT TO SMILE AND SAY "i gt that alot of times" I NOE MY PERSONALITY IS WEIRD...WAD I DO FOR U ALL IS WEIRD BUT THIS IS HW I DO THINGS...Y PUT TO SO THAT I FEEL THAT WAD I DID I MEANINGLESS??? I ALWAYS TRY NOT TO DO THINGS THAT MIGHT BE OFFENSIVE TO U.

BE CONT. WHEN I KNOW WAD TO WRITE ABT MY FCK UP LIFE AGAIN