tml...

mondae...technically todae and still is tml for me haha...when i go slp and wake from my slp...a new sem will start again and i will be busy again...this time i want to study more, go out more and work less :P....nxt sem...i will

-try not to be late as usual
-try to be more optimistic
-go out more often
-learn new things
-regain my poly life again....
-die from poly life haha

i realise i laugh alot...often my "haha" mean alot of things...can be cos its funny, sometimes im being sarcastic , being cold, sometimes i jus said haha just to make noise...no 1 understands my laughter...i laugh when im sad, i laugh when im happy, i laugh when im pissed off at my life, i laugh...at anything and everything....cos laughter is wad exchanges my true feelings and emotion...everytime i have an overwhelming feeling of hugging...not jus any1...jus a specific girl that i like for a long time...she dunno that i like her...thats the saddest part...cos...i dunno...i jus wanna be close wif her...i know im being selfish.but i wanted to held her close to me and nver let go...thats the emotion and feeling i get when i reflecting...i truly have a laughing face...i can smile at anything...even when i know ur scolding me...i will take it directly and yet smile...cos once u manage to wipe my smile off my face, rage will set in haha...nobody really understood my laughter de....and my smile...truly, they are my shield, my cover,my facade. cos i dunwan ppl to know my true emotions...haha...does that mean im deceiving every1 all this time? not really, sometimes i will sometimes i dun...the only person that can manage to break my facade will be the person that really care for me...and for this i will allow her to see my pitiful side...

issit ok for me to like her?

thats the question i ask myself even now...issit ok for me to like some1...do i even gt the potential...i know im boring...i cant help it...i even started to feel bad texting "hi, how are u?" or "hey...hows ur day todae?" to her liao...cos. i have no creativity to make it more interesting...i have always been like that ahaha....there are moments where i will stop to think "shld i text her this msg again" and i always will think " i dunwan her to hate me...see my sms nia will say"haiz..him again...hen fan leh" BUT in the end i still sms her...i find tht during work i cant conc. well cos my mind is thinking abt other things...worried abt her...i dunno la...jus not myself anymore lor..then when she talk to me i will like recharged one...there will come a day when its too late for me...or it has alrdy been too late...i dunno....im scared...but i dunno....

tml sch start le...nd to slp...nites=) tml mayb i will start to blog abt todae's work bah...